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The ends of eras

First, I whine.

I'm fucking stressed out of my nut. I keep waking up with anxiety attacks, and have the constant stomach-squeezing feeling of adrenaline coursing through me. I have a thin sheen of fear sweat. My limbs are tingly in that way you get when you are anticipating the need for a fight-or-flight response. I hate it. I keep thinking that I might do something stupid.

I think I need to step back. No, I *know* I need to step back, but it is all a matter of timing. I *should* do it right now, but that is a logistical nightmare. Stepping away now means that I have to waste a whole lot of time later setting up things so that I can start again. Stepping away now means that I may yet save some of my delicate psyche from damage, but means in the long run I am going to just get stressed out more and again.

Something needs to give, and I don't think I am strong enough to have that something *not* be me.

To other things. I'll put up a session report later, but last night was the last session of my D&D game in my current house. The next session will be but a few days after we move, so I'd best think of some plot in the meantime... And I taught my players a valuable lesson about getting cocky. Bam, I say. Not a total party kill, but if the dice had been a little more even (the players were rolling really well, and I was rolling quite poorly) the situation would have been very interesting in the Chinese sense.

Moving stuff. morsla is trying to convince me to hire a small van for the move. I will speak to nuwishas_tail about it, seeing as how he also brought it up. My theory is that if nuwishas_tail is game to deal with all the truckful hire and drive, and I hand him money to make the problem go away, then everything will be okay.

We shall see.

In other news, I am terribly glad I don't take myself too seriously, or I would be in worse shape.

Comments

( 5 comments — Leave a comment )
(Deleted comment)
aeduna
Apr. 14th, 2005 01:16 am (UTC)
We did an entire household into two trips with a 3tonne truck. Beds, couches, fridges, washing machines, tables; they all go in it with no pissing about with trailers or wondering if it will go into someone's station wagon. Costs about $150, with a trolley. I can't recommend it enough....
kitling
Apr. 14th, 2005 01:52 am (UTC)
I've usually done the cart most stuff in cars the night before, soft, breakable, electronics and then use the van/truck for heavy stuff.

I find that works really well.

I hired a truck that came with moving men once - but that wasn't so good. I was paying by the hour for two men, but one of them spent most of his time dawdling or smoking and the other moved very slowly, I had two other friends there that ended up doing most of the heavy lifting.

next time I just hire a truck or borrow, and friends.
delwyn
Apr. 14th, 2005 01:59 am (UTC)
Having used a 3-tonne truck for moving house several times, I highly recommend them. Having also driven said trucks on multiple occassions I'm willing to volunteer my services as driver should you want to hire one.
harkon
Apr. 14th, 2005 02:01 am (UTC)
When we moved to our current place, my father and my younger self hired a truck and a man to drive it. We did have a van as well though and we did the move for the entire family home in one day. It was one trip with the truck guy and several more in the van. If we did it again two trip with the truck would have definately been worth it, since it had a powered lifty thingy. So I guess my point is, the truck is worth it, especially if you have a lot of people with not a lot of cars.
( 5 comments — Leave a comment )